Dumping Going On

I’ve graduated from an eight week cigarette cessation class at Public Health. The teacher has learned a lot of Philosophy presumably because it was her major in college. She is real nice. She indicated that if someone is coming up with dirt about me that there is dumping going on.

I’ve been writing in my blog with the intention to resolve a problem that arises for someone interested in me. There is dumping going on? People are getting nasty because there is dumping going on? The teacher who may have majored in Philosophy isn’t bringing up problems with me. She feels more like a support person.

I’m responding to the dumping? I don’t want to do it anymore. If you have a problem, the chances are pretty good that I have addressed it already. One classmate in the class I took gave me a mint; if only she could read 17990!

English Professor

In 1989 while living with my girlfriend at our Goleta apartment I attended Santa Barbara City College. The most peculiar English professor had me in which I was subjected to things parallel. Because I took his class I was being opened. It is sort of like a feeling of nervousness and jumpiness, or like something is about to happen. I suppose I got that from one of the reading materials, Far Tortuga. But there were other books like Gertrude Stein. She had written with the remarkable willingness to repeat her words. So, yes I was being opened but there was a certainty involved.

I was recently opened, and it brought back a lot of feelings about my experience in that English class. I imagine that I am getting over the trouble I was in after my concert fiasco and the painting. I guess I felt that my professor was getting through my historical difficulties and could still reach me. Being opened this time was reassuring.

Comment; Dec. 29, 2015. I want to comment on this post now that I have some insight on being opened. The remedy for the feeling I described here is the tea ceremony. Place the hot teacup on the table in front of you and allow it to cool until drinkable.

I Am Toning

I’m reading The Mozart Effect by Don Campbell and there is a section on Toning. I got interested in toning when I realized there is a lot of Ah’s and Om’s in my speech. I’m not thinking letters. What else could I be doing then?

I realized that I am toning. I have since found some value in elongating those Ah’s and Om’s in the form of a natural sounding tone. I am dealing with my problem in a productive way: Toning!

YouTube Video on Vocal Toning

Intervention 9192

If intervention, then gather facts. There are enough facts in 9192 to warrant fact gathering for an outside viewer. The determinant in this case is Elizabeth’s response to my approach; that was intervention to what was intended. The bouncer helped Elizabeth. That may have been intervention of a certain kind, but may have been more than what was needed. After all, all I had in mind was what my sister told me. It would have been perfect if the situation played out without intervention. This is not a perfect event. That is why I have provided as many facts as I can remember.

  • The DSM-III-R; 1987
  • Diagnosis Frotteurism 302.89.

9192

I’ve been stretched over Elizabeth’s back. She tried to flip me over, but I was drunk and pretty much dead weight. I let out a humph. That was at the Sonic Youth concert where they were presenting Thurston’s Bridal with the album Goo.

I got to that point from leaving the crowd in front of the stage. I was feeling sick and thought I needed some air. As I left the stage area the crowd thinned out. I thought about what my sister had told me; that she liked getting felt up in crowds. I saw Elizabeth out in the open and went toward her. The crowd is a pushy contact sort of experience and I don’t think I adjusted to the lesser. So when she saw me coming towards her, she took my arm combatively and tried to flip me over her back.

I met Elizabeth again in Seattle, Washington at Community House Mental Health. We talked indirectly about the Goo concert. She knows me socially and knows a lot about medications. The doorman was also at Community House. His area of expertise was employment. He remembered me because I talked to him right before getting kicked out of the Goo concert.

The bouncer took me to the doorman by dragging me backwards by my heels. I said to him,  “I have to find my sister. I can’t get kicked out. I have to find my sister!” The doorman was really nice to me.

“Why, what happened?” I asked. He replied, “You don’t know do you.”

Outside, I found the car and crawled underneath. I was scared and thought no one would find me there. When the concert ended, my party including my sister returned to the car. I heard her asking, “Where is Jeff?” I was underneath the car.

I got carsick on the way back to grandma’s house. I stopped listening to Sonic Youth and most Rock-n-Roll in general. That little escapade stopped me from listening to the Downsiders.

Just a little background about when this happened; this took place after my girlfriend cheated because my sister and her boyfriend were living in Santa Cruz. That was the summer of 1989. I began the Xiphoid and painted approximately a year and a half later. For most people though this time coincides with the publishing of Sonic Youth’s album Goo.

Comment: August 30th, 2024: I found my sister sufficiently on August 9th, 2024, I realized Kant’s Categorical Imperative. This is also expected to satisfy the Eye and Mind essay by Maurice Merlot Ponty, 1965.

The Laurel House

Progress Place umbrella of services included a transitional house for clients until they get independent housing: Laurel House at 3133 Laurel Street in Napa California. I stayed there a few months in 1995. What that house has is an old water softener system that isn’t being used. The staff knows about this feature because in the garage there is six fifty pound bags of rock salt from when the system was working. The rock salt is a remnant collecting dust and cobwebs. I think I knew about that when I was there; but, I surely didn’t forget it for six years after. Laurel House made a big impression on me. And, I really appreciate getting to stay. Thank you Laurel House!

Girlfriend 1990

  • I stubbed my toe on the coffee table – Rose
  • It hurt really bad – Rose
  • My girlfriend was there – Rose
  • She said, “I feel good.” – Rose
  • The rose is for pain – Rose
  • I should have given her a hug and told her I loved her – Rose
  • We eventually broke up because I didn’t get a Rose